00:00:03:20 - 00:00:20:19 Deadair Dennis Word up, everybody. Welcome to Word of the day with comedians. I'm your host, Deadair Dennis Maler. And joining me on the program today is comedian, yoga instructor and mom and probably has a cooler background than I do with a brick wall because comedy needs to be done in front of a brick wall. It's Orchid Cameron. 00:00:20:19 - 00:00:24:14 Orchid Cameron Thanks Deadair Dennis, thanks for having me. 00:00:25:05 - 00:00:33:12 Deadair Dennis Oh, my pleasure. Thanks for joining us today. All the way from sunny California where I'm in "sunny Boston," which means the sun's out, but it's still frickin cold. 00:00:33:26 - 00:00:41:12 Orchid Cameron Oh, man. It's so beautiful here. I mean, Fiona, my six year old, just spent yesterday at the beach and it was just perfect, perfect weather. 00:00:41:12 - 00:00:58:28 Deadair Dennis I do like how prior to us recording when you were getting set up, "hey, I'm going to go record a podcast. Don't bother mommy for a little bit. Also, don't stick those in your ears or nose." Like that, that's peak parenthood right there, going don't bother me. Also, whatever that is, don't put that in your face. 00:00:58:28 - 00:01:15:00 Orchid Cameron They're these tiny little pony beads. Do you know what pony beads are? It's like what goes at the end of your hair. If you braid your hair, they're little tiny beads. They're perfect nostril and ear hole size. And there's just something about children where they're like, you know where this should go? 00:01:16:25 - 00:01:18:24 Deadair Dennis Don't put that in your ear, like, all right, then. 00:01:19:06 - 00:01:34:29 Orchid Cameron Yeah. So this morning, she was swimming face down in a sandbox. And so when she came up, she had like a whole beard, a full beard of sand. And then when we walked home, she's like, "Mommy, I still have sand in my nose." 00:01:37:06 - 00:01:39:00 Deadair Dennis Yeah, that's going to be there for the next two weeks, honey. 00:01:39:17 - 00:01:57:12 Orchid Cameron And I'm just like, Oh, is that comfortable? You can't tell kids things. You have to ask them. It's the Socratic method. You can't. You can't teach them anything by telling them. It's just like, how does that feel? Actually, how does sand shoved up your nose feel? Oh, OK. Interesting. 00:01:58:03 - 00:02:35:12 Deadair Dennis Now I just want to see your daughter just go face first swimming through sand pop up and just, like, blow her nose and then sand comes shooting out her ears. And that now brings us to our word of the day. Our word of the day today is Bilbo. And let me make sure that that is the correct pronunciation, because I can't be trusted to pronounce words because I went to six years of community college and didn't graduate. And that's why we have the artificial intelligence, Annie the pronouncer bot who will tell us, make sure I'm saying the word Bilbo correctly. 00:02:35:22 - 00:02:38:04 Deadair Dennis Bilbo. Bilbo. Yep. 00:02:38:04 - 00:02:41:08 Orchid Cameron You're smart as a robot, Dennis. You're as smart as a robot. 00:02:42:18 - 00:03:13:06 Deadair Dennis Now, of course I know the word Bilbo because I'm a nerd. And I watched The Lord of the Rings movies. I didn't read The Lord of the Rings books because I'm a nerd, but I'm also mostly illiterate. So I watched the Tolkien cartoons and then the movies. So I know the word Bilbo, but apparently Bilbo is an actual word, not just from a fictional, fictitious name of a character, but it also apparently stands for a long bar of iron with sliding shackles used to confine the feet of prisoners, especially on shipboard. 00:03:13:20 - 00:03:15:29 Orchid Cameron Deadair, that sounds exactly like marriage. 00:03:16:28 - 00:03:30:03 Deadair Dennis Yes, you know, here's the second definition, probably also relates to marriage is the second definition is the word sword, which apparently a lot of marriages has stabbings anyway. So. 00:03:31:17 - 00:03:42:20 Orchid Cameron Well, the funny part of that is I was reading about the sword version, and it's a bendable sword. It's not like a firm sword. It's the floppy, sad married sword. 00:03:45:23 - 00:04:09:01 Deadair Dennis Did you know? Fact is, first known use of Bilbo as a type of shackle was in 1557, perhaps originating from Bilboa, Spain. The second definition of these type of sword likely also comes from Bilboa, Spain, where the sword was crafted beginning in 1587. Bilbo is the name of the hero of J.R.R. Tolkien's novel The Hobbit, which was printed in 1937. 00:04:09:22 - 00:04:25:01 Deadair Dennis His real Hobbit name is Bilba, which is of unknown, meaning but this was altered by Tolkien in order to use the more masculine O ending. In the novel, Bilbo Baggins is recruited by the wizard Gandalf, who joined the quest to retake Mount Erebor from the Dragon Smaug. 00:04:25:11 - 00:04:29:09 Orchid Cameron I read the books in elementary school. You didn't read the books in elementary school? 00:04:29:16 - 00:04:34:07 Deadair Dennis No, to be honest, I've only read two books all the way through... 00:04:34:07 - 00:04:35:18 Orchid Cameron In your life? 00:04:35:18 - 00:04:43:00 Deadair Dennis in my entire life, not counting comic books, obviously, or graphic novels. I won't count those. One of them is Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. 00:04:43:06 - 00:04:44:06 Orchid Cameron Oh, yeah. Good one. 00:04:44:06 - 00:04:54:02 Deadair Dennis By Douglas Adams. And then the other one was and I asked people, Please don't judge me for this, "How I lost 5lbs. in six years: The Autobiography of Tom Arnold." 00:04:54:03 - 00:05:10:04 Orchid Cameron Oh, no, no, that's good. Tom Arnold is cool. I've been on set with him. I think he's a super nice person. I thought he was really sweet to everybody. I don't know. I was playing a waitress. If you were like, Hey, do you remember that girl Orchid when she was in a movie with you? He would be like, No. 00:05:14:22 - 00:05:33:02 Deadair Dennis He'll probably go, yes, because he's that nice guy. But really, I was like, no, why would I remember that? Well, yeah. So you've read the Tolkien novels. Are you are you big into fantasy stuff or is it one of those? I read it because it's one of those things that we have to read. Growing up in this day and age. 00:05:33:19 - 00:05:58:25 Orchid Cameron I'm not big on fantasy. Honestly, I, I like to read nonfiction. I read a lot of how to books, or I'll get obsessed with topics and just read everything about that topic. Like I'm really into architecture and I went through a phase where I just read everything there is to know about polished concrete. I'm obsessed with polished concrete. And then another week I'll be like. 00:05:58:25 - 00:06:00:27 Deadair Dennis You needed to know how to build that giant brick wall behind you. 00:06:01:04 - 00:06:29:05 Orchid Cameron I'll be like, Do you know about octagon houses? Because they're amazing. Obviously read about the history of round houses to modern round houses and who's making prefab round houses and who's, you know, just like the who's who of round house building like. So I think what I'm saying is I've surpassed the nerdiness of my childhood of reading Tolkien novels, to 00:06:29:05 - 00:06:36:15 Orchid Cameron Just reading. Yeah. Just like want to learn how to do things. So, like, I'm obsessed with learning. 00:06:36:22 - 00:06:41:21 Deadair Dennis You graduated from fantasy nerdiness to actual real life nerdiness. 00:06:41:28 - 00:06:56:18 Orchid Cameron Real life practical nerdiness. Exactly. My daughter is pretty similar to me. I have to hide all the power tools or she'll use them on, you know, she just doesn't. 00:06:56:18 - 00:07:00:09 Deadair Dennis You're going to get the pony beads out of your ear without a drill press? 00:07:02:03 - 00:07:11:06 Orchid Cameron If I don't hide even just a screwdriver, she'll unscrew and screw everything in the house. She'll just, like, put a bunch of holes in the drywall because she's so excited to use tools. 00:07:11:18 - 00:07:17:08 Deadair Dennis That's how I was as a kid. I would take so many things apart and then fail at putting them back together. 00:07:18:18 - 00:07:34:08 Orchid Cameron She can put things back together. She's actually legit handy. I've had her put furniture together, like, more complicated than IKEA furniture. Like other furniture. She'll build whole things. I made her build our own Christmas present. 00:07:36:14 - 00:08:02:12 Deadair Dennis But now all in picture is hers underneath the sink, like a plumber, you know, plumber, plumber's crack just going at the J bend underneath the saying, like well, here's your popping seven year old kid with with grease all over her face. Like, see, use your problem here. You're trap got clogged up with all the hair. What you need to do is you need to get a little screen at the top to stop all the hair. And then wipes her hand off with the dirty cloth that comes out of her back pocket. 00:08:02:20 - 00:08:14:18 Orchid Cameron A lot of people, like, love babies and, like, oh, my gosh, babies are so cute. And other people are like, love cars till they speak like jargon about it. You know how people are super excited about cars? That's how much I love contractors. 00:08:19:13 - 00:08:30:01 Orchid Cameron I love plumbers, electricians, and HVAC technicians. I'm like, Oh, little tradespeople. 00:08:31:18 - 00:08:38:15 Deadair Dennis Some guys, you know, on a Saturday night go out and go to a strip club and drink you on a Sunday morning go to Home Depot. 00:08:38:15 - 00:09:00:07 Orchid Cameron I love Home Depot. I love Home Depot. It's funny, if I go to Home Depot in my paint clothes, no one will help me. Not even the people who work there. But if I wear a dress and lipstick, everyone helps me. Even people who don't work there. One time a guy approached me. And he's like, "I don't normally do this, but can I buy you dinner?" 00:09:00:23 - 00:09:08:20 Orchid Cameron And I just, like straight said, "will you tile my bathroom?" And he was just like, "how big is your bathroom?" 00:09:14:16 - 00:09:23:17 Deadair Dennis Which, by the way, now that's a new set of romance novels that you need to start writing is romance novels of just Home Depot contractor euphemisms. 00:09:24:07 - 00:09:34:27 Orchid Cameron So for you, you're picturing the guy with his shirt off and big muscles doing the tile. And that's the sexy part for you. But for me, having a nice bathroom, that's sexy enough, like there's no. 00:09:37:15 - 00:09:58:14 Deadair Dennis Well, in fairness, I'm not picturing I'm not picturing Fabio after you. I am picturing a balding fat guy that has belly buttons probably sticking out of his stained wife beater t shirt. His name's Carl, of course, "you know little lady," and he's picking his belly like was. "Hey, let me take you to dinner sometime?" And by dinner he means the hot dog cart out front of Home Depot. 00:09:58:24 - 00:10:08:00 Deadair Dennis I was like, "Yeah, you know, we'll get you a hot dog. You get mustard if you want or relish, you know, I got relish money, and then I'll, you know, tile your bathroom." 00:10:08:00 - 00:10:13:04 Orchid Cameron Bacon wrapped hot dogs are the street food in L.A. Do you know about this bacon wrapped hot dog thing? 00:10:13:10 - 00:10:16:06 Deadair Dennis I've heard of people wrapping hot dogs in bacon. 00:10:16:06 - 00:10:26:28 Orchid Cameron Every time you leave a club drunk at, like, two in the morning, two or three in the morning. There's all these little carts that they're making bacon wrapped hot dogs. Can you imagine trying to resist that while drunk? 00:10:27:10 - 00:10:36:18 Deadair Dennis Being unable to resist hot dogs is how I got in this condition that I'm made up of not being able to resist hot dog. That I'm 85% hot dog. 00:10:36:27 - 00:10:48:23 Orchid Cameron Yeah you're 85% hot dog. Yeah I I'm on a pretty strict pizza and cereal diet myself. I slipped up today and had a salad but, you know one day at a time. 00:10:50:24 - 00:11:00:02 Deadair Dennis You know what you eat what you can when you have it like you know there's nothing wrong with a comfort food salad. There's you know it's a dreary day salad is going to hit the spot when you're sad. 00:11:01:15 - 00:11:03:25 Orchid Cameron When you're sad and lonely. Just have salad. 00:11:05:25 - 00:11:22:20 Deadair Dennis If that was the truth. Oh, man, I wouldn't need to have not one but two cardiologists. All right. We have officially picked our word of the day. We have defined it. And we have created a sentence using it in context. And to present all that for you is my guest Orchid Cameron. 00:11:22:26 - 00:11:46:15 Orchid Cameron Hi! So our word of the day is Bilbo, a long bar of iron with sliding shackles used to confine the feet of prisoners, especially on shipboard. And it also means sword. And the sentences "Carl got locked into a Bilbo after he thought the woman in a dress at Home Depot was flirting with him when she asked if he could tile her bathroom. 00:11:46:15 - 00:11:48:17 Orchid Cameron And then he flopped out as Bilbo." 00:11:48:24 - 00:12:07:27 Deadair Dennis Ha! Excellent. Perfect. All right, everybody, we've officially expanded our vocabulary by one more word today. I want to thank all of you for watching or listening and for those who have subscribed. Thank you so much. If you haven't done so, go ahead and do that. That way you can continue to expand your vocabulary, the funniest way possible each and every day that you listen or watch the program. 00:12:08:02 - 00:12:15:15 Deadair Dennis And also, I want to thank Orchid Cameron, my guest, for helping us choose this word. And for helping to come up with the sentence. Please tell everyone where they can find you. 00:12:15:16 - 00:12:20:21 Orchid Cameron You can find me on Orchid Cameron dot com and my Instagram at Orchid Cameron. 00:12:20:21 - 00:12:40:28 Deadair Dennis Awesome. Thank you so much for watching. And don't forget to word up. Thank you so much for watching this episode of Word of the Day with comedians all the way to the end. I greatly appreciate it. And if you want, continue, keep expanding your vocabulary the funniest way possible. I recommend clicking this bounce right here to watch our latest episode. 00:12:41:14 - 00:12:50:07 Deadair Dennis Of course, stay up to date with everything by subscribing or listening. To A Word of the day with comedians on the go by downloading it on iTunes or Spotify.